Anthony thanks for
share my article its a honor.
Stephan about mula bandha in my experiencie in asana in some
moment i feel some like fire in the pelvic special in sirsasana is some
reaction when apana arise, of course in ashtanga we trie to active for have
more chance that this occurs, mula bandha, but of course engage pelvic is not
mula bandha, only is some tecnic that you can have more chance for create mula
bandha. In the hath yoga pradipika i think said that when some yogi enter in
some very deep meditation bandhas spontaneous occurs and left the prana flow
free from the root to crown of head. In pranayama practice is more accurate the
action and sensitive to the energetic feelings.In vipassana meditation i've
feel something like that. Im sure that Anthony can say much better
Much more than an answer:
First, no one could say
it better for you are truly inspired by the Holy ones that came before you in
all the yoga lineages. In this moment, I think of my Guru, the love of my life
and share with you a love letter that just came to be when starting this ‘article’
which at this point is not a good description for this is a true share, Sat
Sang and a blessing.
Dearest Beloved,
You have always warned me to
make little of mystical experiences and I have taken heed of that warning as
all of your teachings and advice has been good for me.
Four days ago I started a
blog on yoga therapy, health and the like. It has been moving very fast and I
have been getting a lot of attention. Just now, about to write and article
about the grace of the Guru, needing to make room at my messy desk, I moved
your picture from the right side of the monitor in order to move some wires
(not important), placing your picture directly in front and a bit to
the right of the center of the monitor. I smiled and thought that is where it
should be anyway. At that moment as far as I can remember in this now altered
state, very beautiful music of the east/west genera started playing. About to
make a skype call, it seemed necessary to stop the music, clicking off every
thing that was open on my computer, checking the cd drawer (nothing in it), the
music is still playing. I checked and quit skype, with trepidation in my heart,
now knowing that it was time to write you and not wanting the music, the
mystical experience of music playing for no understandable reason.
The music is still playing.
You are the love that
pervades who I am and who I am not. You are the love that is expressed more
than it is not. I have been singing the songs more recently, you know, the
songs I sang to you. My life would not be filled with as much of this all
pervading love and growing understanding of
the incomprehensible bliss of salvation of the Holy MotherFather
because of you. Between crying and exaltation, no tears will come; well, maybe
one. I, the I that is no longer I but is me, loves you dearly, no, blissfully,
no fully and without walls of consideration, without bridges of union for we are
one. This oneness stems form your omnipresent love and maybe a little because I
have been always yours, yours in imperfection, yours in recolection, your in
resurection. The love that is not mine, ever growing, ever stowing...away in my
heart. My heart that is no longer mine but ours. I do know that there is a
logical reason for the music and remember talking with you of how laws of
nature contribute to the making of miracles. You brought me into your fold and
the single tear is flowing alone over the skin and bones of the cheek that is
no longer mine. Singularly loving You.
Your anthony.
mailing this to you now with
the unedited trust of Your eternal love. Forgive this fraud of a god that he
may know you ever more as his and only his, never arriving, never leaving. Amen
We are
blessed by grace Toni; we could never have the experiences of love, the
mystical rising of the Kundilini with just yoga practice. It takes Guru Kripa,
the grace of the guru. Many may site examples of spontaneous awakening but that
is just what the poor of site could see. Behind the cosmic scenes are always
the guru and the maha guru. I know for instance from a brief awakened state
that Maha Avatar BabaJi did initiate Jesus as the Christ. Your teachers and
guides are always with you and the determining factor will always be your trust
and commitment. Doubt is not your enemy; doubt is your best friend in the
finding of your true Guru. KPJ was like a father to me but he was not my Guru.
KPJ inspired me and taught me and still does but it was a woman that became my
Guru.
Many will
not believe the story I am about to tell and many will judge me and claim that
I am crazy and that they know all about me, my many mistakes, some of them true
and some of them not. This makes no difference to me at this stage of my life
for I am only for Thee. It has been told to me many times by the Divine ones
that one must be completely outrageous to know God. Again recently this has
been told to me, loud and clear, on the inner the silent voice of the One
warned me to be completely myself and that it never serves an aspirant of the
Divine to hide who they are for who they truly are can only be seen by the
Divine.
The day had
been hell on earth, my ego wanted to check out. I was pulling double shifts at
a spiritual retreat to make up for those who resented seva, saying they did not
pay for this retreat only to have to work. I felt that this life was over that
the love I truly sought was in death. I climbed dangerously close to the edge
of a rock cliff overlooking the magnificence of one of Gods rivers. Sitting
down to meditate, folding my legs tight into padmasana I claimed meditation
with my disturbed ego. Ajai breathe forcing out the demons of my disappointment,
yelling inwardly and outwardly, “Take me Lord, take me, I do not want to be
here any longer. And then something happened, relaxation spread herself all
over me like a Kashmir shawl mad from the majestic materials that live only in
dreams. I was prompted to release the lotus and sit in sidasana and to move
back away from the threat of the cliff dropping in front of me. Light beings
appeared like rain falling and rising at the same time, angels swimming in the
ocean of ether all surrounding me and then it happened. Most assuredly
different than the cessation of my breath that I had briefly experienced during
a forty day fast. The kundilini rose like a wave gently crashing and rising up
a pali only to illuminate the mountain side with gentle bliss. My crown chakra
turned golden and Anthony was nowhere to be found. I don’t know how many hours
passed. Two students of my Guru told me later that they heard her on the inner
tell them to go find me. It could have been disastrous if, for instance a
forest warden or a tourist had found me. First a women came and walked up to me
not realizing the depth of what I now refer to as semi-samadhi. She placed her
hand on my back and said my name and the body that was temporarily not mine
exploded. What happened next, I must explain, did not happen in linear time, it
happened all at once. I experienced a deep sadness, crying, shaking,
convulsing, feeling deep empathy for she who had woke me with such naivety,
knowing she felt immediately guilty for not realizing where I was residing at
the moment she touched and spoke to me, The ego got a hold of me and said, ‘you
are a real yogi now Anthony, you can sell this shit’, I prayed,” Lord protect
me from the arrogant grasp of this belligerent ego self. Remember this is all
happening in a millisecond. The second student, a large man now shows up with
pillow and blanket in hand. Understand that the women needed to get there
quickly to protect me and empowered by
the Guru, remind me not to indulge in the trauma of the experience but he
needed to get there prepared to nurture and heal my nearly obliterated nervous
system. They stayed with me until I could stand with his help, guiding and
holding me across rocks to the river’s edge. At the retreat a temple had been
assembled. With his strength I was ushered to the area of the temple where the
Guru to many in the group was going to speak and give darshan. After she arrived
and was settled she called me over. I crawled to her and knelt at her knees
where she placed her hands on me, leaned down and whispered, “Isn’t it glorious
beloved?” I crawled back to where the man with the pillow and blanket enfolded
me and kept me safe until the end of the evening. I have been recovering ever
since for this was Semi-Samadhi. I was still the same man with the same issues
and challenges of the personality but I had had a glimpse and the structure of
my nadis had been changed forever. This is not the glamour one might associate
with mystical experience. It is the blessing in disguise and nearly tore my
life apart only to survive through faith and trust and continuing on the path
of a yogi. My life has been anything but easier ever since and for that I am grateful.
Sounds like a contradiction but there is nothing worth learning in the life of
a yogi that is easy and pleasant. In our society the yogi’s path is not
supported. Oh the yogi athlete, that is one thing but the deeper path is a
blessing followed by one more challenge followed by another blessing and an
even greater challenge and so on. How else are we to awaken?
Asato Ma Sad
Gamaya
For an
entire year I lived with the thought that something I had done, some technique,
some great surrender had lifted me into the arena of the great yogis. Not true!
Yes we are all at different stages of spiritual evolution and are born with
different propensities toward spiritual life but without the Guru Kripa we are
awash in the turbulence of the path and may never receive the blessings of yoga
and many of us are not even interested, which is certainly perfect for it is
not a question of if but of when.
At the end
of that year a year that lasted 1111 days, I went to another retreat with my
Beloved. Soon after arriving, I was asked to meet her. She ushered me to a
place to sit and asked me what I saw. Awe struck, I sat there looking at the
rock where one year prior, the blessings of the Guru, the Guru Kripa had
changed my life forever.
Jai Guru
For those of
you who are offended by the idea of giving your power away to another, that is
not what this is about. This is about surrender to the truth; this is about
recognizing the truth and greedily taking full advantage of it.
Blessings